Wednesday, November 11, 2009
Friday, November 06, 2009
Thursday, November 05, 2009
Notes from the Underground
"Every decent man of our time is and must be a coward and a slave. This is his normal condition. I'm deeply convinced of it. This is how he's made and what he's meant to be. And not only at the present time, as the result of some accidental circumstance, but in general at all times, a decent man must be a coward and slave. This is a law of nature for all decent men on earth. If one of them should happen to be brave about something or other, we shouldn't be comforted or distracted: he'll still lose his nerve about something else. That's the single and eternal way out. Only asses and their mongrols are brave, and even then, only until they come up against a wall. It's not worthwhile paying them any attention because they really don't mean anything at all."
"In short, anything can be said about world history, anything that might occur to the most disordered imagination. There's only one thing that can't possibly be said about it-that it's rational. You'll choke on the word. Yet here's just the sort of thing you'll encounter all the time: why, in life you're constantly running up against people who are so well0behaved and so rational, such wise men and lovers of humanity who set themselves the lifelong goal of behaving as morally and rationally as possible, so to speak, to be a beacon for their nearest and dearest, simply in order to prove that it's really possible to live ones live in a moral and rational way. And so what? It's a well known fact that many of these lovers of humanity, sooner or later, by the end of their lives, have betrayed themselves: they've pulled off some caper, sometimes even quite an indecent one."
"In short, anything can be said about world history, anything that might occur to the most disordered imagination. There's only one thing that can't possibly be said about it-that it's rational. You'll choke on the word. Yet here's just the sort of thing you'll encounter all the time: why, in life you're constantly running up against people who are so well0behaved and so rational, such wise men and lovers of humanity who set themselves the lifelong goal of behaving as morally and rationally as possible, so to speak, to be a beacon for their nearest and dearest, simply in order to prove that it's really possible to live ones live in a moral and rational way. And so what? It's a well known fact that many of these lovers of humanity, sooner or later, by the end of their lives, have betrayed themselves: they've pulled off some caper, sometimes even quite an indecent one."
Friday, October 30, 2009
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
Monday, October 26, 2009
I eat a pot cookie from a man selling them, finish the rest of my beer, end up drinking some brandy someone brought, find myself floating away and lying back on the green grass staring at the view of the city, thinking how it doesn’t look real, thinking about tidal waves and earthquakes, 1906 and the gold rush, and staring at the humongous school across the street through my knockoff brand wayfarer sunglasses I can only hear sounds of laughing and dogs barking, an occasional basketball hitting the pavement down at the courts, a mans boom box he has fixated on the back of his bike, playing Bob Marley, as he rides through the crowd, a distant siren from some where on the right of us in the Mission, and yells, constant yells from people who do or don’t feel alive in someway or another.
Friday, October 23, 2009
I’m on the corner of Haight and Divisidero contemplating walking. There are at least 15 people waiting with me. Some of the people are from the liquor store. Two guys are shot gunning beers on the sidewalk. A cop car passes on Divisidero but does nothing. Another person waiting is handicapped and in a wheelchair. That will complicate the whole bus ride’s time by 15 minutes or so. Everyone on board the bus will have to move towards the back, the bus will have to drop lower to the ground and release a ramp to get the person up. There will be yelling and stepping on or rolling over feet. The electronic timer in the bus shelter says 18 minutes until the next bus. I think of the beer in my backpack then decide to walk and catch another bus later. Think about stopping for food at the Thai place at the corner but it’s already two in the afternoon and I can’t shake the pull of the park. A bum across the street is peeing into the middle of the street. I think I see his penis but don’t bother to look again. I hear his laughing as I turn and walk down Haight and glance up at all the shoes hanging from the telephone wires and think about drugs.
Thursday, October 22, 2009
The Dream Syndicate
Really like 'The Dream Syndicate'. A band my friend Sean mentioned. Fit my mood today.
Saw 'Where the Wild Things Are' today as well.
Was cutesy. Made me think about family. Made me think about all the time you spend alone as a child, and what you do to pass the time. So much time spent like that.
The sun is setting, and I'm making soup, waiting for the Laker game.
Monday, October 19, 2009
Wunderkammer writing project - Writers as Kids
I was involved in a project organized by Kathryn Regina.
We received photo's of other writers and had to write a story.
I was given J.A. Tyler
The story I wrote is here
The one written about my photo is here
Sunday, October 18, 2009
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